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FML

Anonymous — Sun Dec 11, 2011 11:46 am

Author: Anonymous

Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 11:46 am

I just got out of the shower and dried off. Here comes the shitty part.

I grab a fresh pair of undies and put them on. Suddenly, intense sporadic ballsack pain. It felt like 5 needles kept poking at different parts of my sack and I couldn't get them off. I looked down at my business and there are about 7 ants crawling all over the sack. This is when I got the fuck in the shower.

At this point, these little fuckers are hanging on for dear life, while also stinging my sack. Fuck them. I thrust my junk under the faucet and had to pick the bastards off individually. I dry off and blow dry my balls. Now to inspect the scene of the crime (my briefs, not my sack).

One fucking ant. One fucking ant remained, the other 7 hopped aboard my junk. Fuckers. I picked him off and killed him with a candle lighter. Fuck him.

The worst part is neither the persistent itching of my genitalia nor the hassle of having to hire an exterminator. No. The worst part is the fear. Every time I feel the slightest itch now, I have to shed my clothing to make sure I'm not being colonized by a horde of fucking ants. There is no peace in this house.

Girls are so stupid ...

Anonymous — Fri Oct 07, 2011 4:49 pm

Author: Anonymous

Posted: Fri Oct 07, 2011 4:49 pm

bym

Anonymous — Wed Aug 31, 2011 8:58 am

Author: Anonymous

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2011 8:58 am

BYM Rapid Upgrade

1.Scan 8B 8A C4 00 00 00 8D 55 84 89...
2.Change mov ecx,[edx+000000C4] to mov ecx,[edx+000000B4]
3.Scroll Up Until you find je 0XXXXXXX
4.Then Change je to jg...
5.Enjoy

VMware error on HP Proliant "Host Baseboard Management

retorq — Mon Jul 18, 2011 8:52 am

Author: retorq

Posted: Mon Jul 18, 2011 8:52 am

Saw this today on a HP Proliant DL380 G7 Server.

Solution

1. The server was built with the HP ESXi build, and the management agents are complaining because the iLO is not connected/configured.

2. When you connect the iLO socket to the network the alarm should change as shown below:

3. Once you have connected or disabled it you can reset the alarm:

4. Log in and configure iLO. Access via a browser (it will get a DHCP address by default, you can set a static IP address by entering the iLO setup at boot (see below)).

5. The user name is Administrator (capital A) and the password will be either on a pull out tab on the front of the server or on a sticker on top of the server chassis:

6. Log in and configure:

Disable the iLO

1. If you do not want to use the iLO then you can disable it (I can't think why you would, its a handy piece of software...)

2. Reboot the server, and when prompted press F8 to enter the iLO setup.

3. Settings > Configure:

4. These are the default settings, use the cursor keys to select and the space bar to enable/disable the options:

5. All disabled:

MYSQL 'search and replace'...

energizer18769 — Fri May 20, 2011 11:02 pm

Author: energizer18769

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 11:02 pm

DOH!!!! Why didn't i think of that????

MYSQL copy a table from one database to another ...

energizer18769 — Fri May 20, 2011 11:02 pm

Author: energizer18769

Posted: Fri May 20, 2011 11:02 pm

you need to get out more......

Drug Culture

Anonymous — Fri May 06, 2011 5:28 pm

Author: Anonymous

Posted: Fri May 06, 2011 5:28 pm

Its really not sad if you think about it committing suicide isn't psychotic at all, in some cases its the best possible solution...

The Theory of The Black Testicle!!

funlovin — Fri May 06, 2011 5:25 pm

Author: funlovin

Posted: Fri May 06, 2011 5:25 pm

LMAO I think it'd be a pretty good argument for what ever woman cheated on her hubby who had this procedure and they ended up with a halfling...he wouldn't have black kids if his wife was white they'd have milados

LG QUANTUM SCREEN REPLACEMENT (HOW TO GUIDE)

energizer18769 — Mon May 02, 2011 1:11 am

Author: energizer18769

Posted: Mon May 02, 2011 1:11 am

you broke it already???

New Fetish?

Anonymous — Sat Feb 05, 2011 8:58 pm

Author: Anonymous

Posted: Sat Feb 05, 2011 8:58 pm

Nice pussy.

lulz

Anonymous — Fri Jan 28, 2011 11:39 am

Author: Anonymous

Posted: Fri Jan 28, 2011 11:39 am

This blind guy came up to me today and I was helping him with some papers at the counter where I work. He then asked if I would like to join him for lunch. I said "No thanks I'm seeing someone". Then he hit me with his cane and called me a motherfucker.

LOLZ

Anonymous — Sun Jan 23, 2011 3:36 pm

Author: Anonymous

Posted: Sun Jan 23, 2011 3:36 pm

LOL way to go felon!